I observe that the basic motive for success is the driving force of envy and jealousy!
Every one's life is driven by something. Right now you may be driven by a problem, a pressure, or a deadline. You may be driven by painful memory, a haunting fear, or an unconscious belief. There are hundreds of circumstances, values, and emotions that can drive your life.
Here are 5 the most common ones:
- Many people are driven by GUILT. They spend their entire lives running from regrets and hiding their shame. Guilt-driven people are manipulated by memories. They allow their past to control their future. They often unconsciously punish themselves by sabotaging their own success.
- Many people are driven by RESENTMENT and ANGER. They hold on to hurts and never get over them. Instead of releasing their pain through forgiveness, they rehearse it over and over in their minds. Some resentment-driven people 'clam up' and internalize their anger, while others 'blow up' and explode it onto others. Both responses are unhealthy and unhelpful. LISTEN: THOSE WHO HAVE HURT YOU IN THE PAST CANNOT CONTINUE TO HURT YOU KNOW UNLESS YOU HOLD ON TO THE PAIN THROUGH RESENTMENT. Your past is PAST!
- Many people are driven by FEAR. Their fears may be a result of a traumatic experience, unrealistic expectations, growing up in a high-control home, or even genetic predisposition. Regardless of the cause, fear-driven people often miss great opportunities because they're afraid to venture out. Instead they play it safe, avoiding risks and trying to maintain the status quo.
- Many people are driven by MATERIALISM. Their desire to acquire becomes tho whole goal of their lives. This drive to always want more is based on the misconceptions that having more will make me more happy, more important, and more secure, but all three ideas are untrue. Possessions only provide temporary happiness.
- Many people are driven by THE NEED FOR APPROVAL. They allow the expectations of parents or spouses or children or teachers or friends to control their lives. Many adults are still trying to earn the approval of unpleasable parents. Others are driven by peer pressure, always worried by what others might think. Unfortunately, those who follow the crows usually get lost in it.
The benefit of Purpose-driven Living:
- Knowing your purpose gives meaning to your life.
- Knowing your purpose simplifies your life.
- Knowing your purpose focuses your life.
- Knowing your purpose motivates your life.
- Knowing your purpose prepares you for eternity.
Point to ponder: Living on purpose is the path to peace.
Verse to remember: " You, LORD, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in you." ( Isaiah 26:3)
Question to consider: What would my family and friends say is the driving force of my life? What do I want it to be?
As for me, the driving force that ever driven me: guilt. Being melancholy made me feel guilty easily. Even though sometimes it's not totally my fault, but my heart won't be at ease unless I ask for forgiveness. This might be a story that happened 10 years ago in my life, but I really find it hard to go on, and the guilty feeling kept bugging me, until I said sorry to the person that I've ever hurt. And sometimes, even though I already apologized, I still feel guilty... Hmm.. not an easy thing, huh? I always pray to God, so that I could be freed from the feeling of guity that never run away from me even though I ask God's mercy, I repented already, and I said sorry to the person personally.
The next one is going to be resentment and anger. I'm what Rick said is a 'clam up' and internalize my anger kind of person. I memorized every single hurt deeply, and on the other hand, for the good things, they're not easily remembered in details. Sometimes, feeling tired of this negative attitude, I tried so hard to change myself and transform into a new person. But, the feeling kept going there made me so helpless.
I'm also driven by fear. Being perfectionist made me think of unrealistic expectations. And some traumatic experience also kept bugging me.
As for materialism, I used to have it few years ago. Now, I think I can handle it better.
The need of approval, I also have the tendency trying to please parents and quite worried with what others might think about me.
Having said those things above, I also realized that I've changed in some ways after knowing Jesus Christ personally. Of course, it all takes process and it's not an overnight transformation. God has been so good to me, and until now, He has shown me more ways to get out of the wrong drives that already been controlling myself without realizing it.
Of course had I known it in the first place, it would be better for me if I could focus myself by knowing my purpose of life. Being in the dark for many years and seems all those days were wasted ... But if I think it another way around, I should also realize that it's also the process of getting each steps of the way to find my true purpose in God. I'm grateful that this is the right time that God has already given to me... (-fon-)